Arandis, Namibia: A Good Day

Saturday, March 20, 2010

A Good Day

Spent part of this morning cleaning the house and doing chores with the children. What is interesting is that it's been rare [to the point that I cannot even pick out an instance] to hear any complaints from them about helping out around here. Whether it's doing the dishes, sweeping, cleaning the bathrooms, washing the floors, dusting, picking up the yard, everyone seems to understand that it is part of what they need to do.

I'm not remembering that I was so cooperative when my sister Pat and I had dish duties when we lived on Tampa Street in Nashua or on those Saturday mornings we used to spend washing the baseboards when we lived on Green Street in Somersworth years ago. Not sure why those two instances stand out so much other than it must have been traumatic for me! And most likely for Pat when I think I happened to drop a big glass bowl on her foot one time.

After we cleaned, the children were rewarded with a some treats they might not have been used to at their previous home, a couple of marshmallows and a movie.

Around noontime, Jackie returned from her ladies morning out to the olive grove with four women who I've decided to call the Arandis Golden Girls. All Americans, two of which are here sort of permanently and two others who graciously spend months here every year, doing what they can to help out the ministry.

Soon, however, I found myself alone as Jackie and Brenda took the six children staying here, Brenda's five children and Elizabeth [who lives with Nan], out on an adventure in the Namib Desert. I chose to stay behind to try and catch up with some of the other children and families that I have yet to really spend time with.

My first stop was to Quail Street, where Chandre lives. Again, for those of you who may not know Chandre, she was one of the first children here in Arandis to capture my heart back in 2006. Back then she was only 9 years old. She will be turning 13 this year and is in seventh grade. Next year she goes on to high school. [Yes, here 8th grade is part of their secondary school.]

I was hoping to get some time in talking with her about all that has gone on these last 6-months or so. She is one of three foster children who needed a new foster family when the one she had been living with decided to leave Arandis and the ministry. Certainly something that was hard for the three who then had to be placed with new families. She is also getting to be of the age when boys start taking more notice, which really bothers me, given the culture here.

So I asked if she wanted to go for a walk and chat but she said she was not really in the mood to go for a walk, but tomorrow she had been planning on coming up to the house to visit. So we'll see... She knows what I want to talk about; how things have been for her, what she is feeling with the new family, school and yes - boys.

Being at that pre-teen age, I am keenly aware of the fact that she might not feel like, as I told her, talking to an old man like me about what's going on in her life or how she's feeling. She chuckled at that and said that wasn't true. So I guess that's a good thing.

From Quail Street I started walking back home and noticed Anna and Zulery were out playing jump rope; with one end tied to a light post. Since I had yet to spend time with them I decided to replace the light post. Soon, Asser and Dennis came out and after a few spins each with the rope, we decided to head out back for a little bit of dodge ball.

It was nice to see that they got tired before I did and wanted to sit down. So, I made that my exit and decided to head on over to visit with Oupa Willem and Ouma Anna. [Oupa and Ouma are grandfather and grandmother in Afrikaans.] Willem is 71 and Anna is 67. They are caring for their four grandchildren; Daniel, Anna-Lee, Lee-Anne and Trevor. With the exception of Anna-Lee, whose mother Lorraine also lives with them, the others have either no living parents (offspring of Willem and Anna) or parents who may not have the means or the desire to care for them. Lorraine has some medical issues and is not really able to live on her own or care for her daughter Anna-Lee on her own.

So often is the case here in Arandis, that grandparents are caring for their grandchildren due to the death of the parent(s) or the / a parent's lack of interest in caring for their own children. The sense of duty that this older generation has is simply incredible.

I had a very nice chat with Willem about the struggles he is having with his age and trying to raise his grandchildren; for them to know right from wrong and not head down any one of life's many wrong paths. I assured him that he was not alone in some of what he was feeling or going through; that as parents and caregivers we all have challenges that we face when raising children. We exchanged a few stories and I think he felt a little better about things when I left; that he was not alone.

While I enjoy being with the six children entrusted to us for four weeks, they are not part of the "Original 11". Five of the six staying here arrived at the ministry prior to my visits in 2008. The sixth, Angela, I had met for the first time when we found out they would be staying here.

It was nice to continue the relationships with others that I have come to know and look forward to seeing during each visit. Yes, I cherish my time with the original 11 ministry children who have been here since my first visit in 2006. And, I think what makes my time with them more special is that the ministry here has gotten so large, it is unlikely that I will be able to forge similar relationships with the new children who are now here; most of who have been added since my last visit in 2008.

Time will just not allow it.

I also think, that the relationship I am now forming with the six children here will be different still from any of the others, including the original 11.

Differences aside, I will miss being in their lives when I leave here.

posted by Don @ 4:08 PM

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