Spent part of this morning cleaning the house and doing chores with the children. What is interesting is that it's been rare [to the point that I cannot even pick out an instance] to hear any complaints from them about helping out around here. Whether it's doing the dishes, sweeping, cleaning the bathrooms, washing the floors, dusting, picking up the yard, everyone seems to understand that it is part of what they need to do.
I'm not remembering that I was so cooperative when my sister Pat and I had dish duties when we lived on Tampa Street in Nashua or on those Saturday mornings we used to spend washing the baseboards when we lived on Green Street in Somersworth years ago. Not sure why those two instances stand out so much other than it must have been traumatic for me! And most likely for Pat when I think I happened to drop a big glass bowl on her foot one time.
After we cleaned, the children were rewarded with a some treats they might not have been used to at their previous home, a couple of marshmallows and a movie.
Around noontime, Jackie returned from her ladies morning out to the olive grove with four women who I've decided to call the Arandis Golden Girls. All Americans, two of which are here sort of permanently and two others who graciously spend months here every year, doing what they can to help out the ministry.
Soon, however, I found myself alone as Jackie and Brenda took the six children staying here, Brenda's five children and Elizabeth [who lives with Nan], out on an adventure in the Namib Desert. I chose to stay behind to try and catch up with some of the other children and families that I have yet to really spend time with.
My first stop was to Quail Street, where Chandre lives. Again, for those of you who may not know Chandre, she was one of the first children here in Arandis to capture my heart back in 2006. Back then she was only 9 years old. She will be turning 13 this year and is in seventh grade. Next year she goes on to high school. [Yes, here 8th grade is part of their secondary school.]
I was hoping to get some time in talking with her about all that has gone on these last 6-months or so. She is one of three foster children who needed a new foster family when the one she had been living with decided to leave Arandis and the ministry. Certainly something that was hard for the three who then had to be placed with new families. She is also getting to be of the age when boys start taking more notice, which really bothers me, given the culture here.
So I asked if she wanted to go for a walk and chat but she said she was not really in the mood to go for a walk, but tomorrow she had been planning on coming up to the house to visit. So we'll see... She knows what I want to talk about; how things have been for her, what she is feeling with the new family, school and yes - boys.
Being at that pre-teen age, I am keenly aware of the fact that she might not feel like, as I told her, talking to an old man like me about what's going on in her life or how she's feeling. She chuckled at that and said that wasn't true. So I guess that's a good thing.
From Quail Street I started walking back home and noticed Anna and Zulery were out playing jump rope; with one end tied to a light post. Since I had yet to spend time with them I decided to replace the light post. Soon, Asser and Dennis came out and after a few spins each with the rope, we decided to head out back for a little bit of dodge ball.
It was nice to see that they got tired before I did and wanted to sit down. So, I made that my exit and decided to head on over to visit with Oupa Willem and Ouma Anna. [Oupa and Ouma are grandfather and grandmother in Afrikaans.] Willem is 71 and Anna is 67. They are caring for their four grandchildren; Daniel, Anna-Lee, Lee-Anne and Trevor. With the exception of Anna-Lee, whose mother Lorraine also lives with them, the others have either no living parents (offspring of Willem and Anna) or parents who may not have the means or the desire to care for them. Lorraine has some medical issues and is not really able to live on her own or care for her daughter Anna-Lee on her own.
So often is the case here in Arandis, that grandparents are caring for their grandchildren due to the death of the parent(s) or the / a parent's lack of interest in caring for their own children. The sense of duty that this older generation has is simply incredible.
I had a very nice chat with Willem about the struggles he is having with his age and trying to raise his grandchildren; for them to know right from wrong and not head down any one of life's many wrong paths. I assured him that he was not alone in some of what he was feeling or going through; that as parents and caregivers we all have challenges that we face when raising children. We exchanged a few stories and I think he felt a little better about things when I left; that he was not alone.
While I enjoy being with the six children entrusted to us for four weeks, they are not part of the "Original 11". Five of the six staying here arrived at the ministry prior to my visits in 2008. The sixth, Angela, I had met for the first time when we found out they would be staying here.
It was nice to continue the relationships with others that I have come to know and look forward to seeing during each visit. Yes, I cherish my time with the original 11 ministry children who have been here since my first visit in 2006. And, I think what makes my time with them more special is that the ministry here has gotten so large, it is unlikely that I will be able to forge similar relationships with the new children who are now here; most of who have been added since my last visit in 2008.
Time will just not allow it.
I also think, that the relationship I am now forming with the six children here will be different still from any of the others, including the original 11.
Differences aside, I will miss being in their lives when I leave here.
Every Thursday, four of the children who are physically, mentally or could benefit from some upper body strength and posture activities, are taken horseback riding at a horse farm outside of Swakop. This activity is intended to build self confidence for the three who are physically and mentally challenged, as well as help with the posture for one of the children who, at her young age, is showing visible signs of rounding shoulders.
These four children include:
Elizabeth, who is twelve and was born with spina bifida and has no use of her legs. Up until her being taken in by Nan Parker, the principal of Talitha Kumi, simply crawled around for most of her life. Today she has prosthetics and is becoming quite the independent girl.
Stephanus, who is also twelve, was living in another orphan care setting and for most of his life along with his twin brother. They are now under the care of Brenda Johnston, here at the ministry. Both boys, who were labeled as 'unable to be educated' where they had been staying previously, have defied their previous label and are doing remarkably well at Talitha Kumi.
Revival, who is nine years old, was born deaf and with what seems like Fetal Alcohol Syndrome symptoms. She attends weekly speech therapy sessions in Swakop and has been amazing to see progress with her speech.
Chriszelda, who is also nine, was suffering from malnutrition when she and her sisters were taken into the ministry here in Arandis. Although under good care now, she continues to struggle with the effects of her prior lack of nutritional care.
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I was the field trip bus driver again yesterday for the trip to the horse farm. Shortly after we started heading towards the coast, we were overcome by some real, serious dense fog. Now, I've traveled the road to Swakop many times since my first trip here in 2006. And, I've seen the dense fog in the early morning, here in Arandis. So individually, both hold no new surprises. However, when combined it was a very odd feeling. I felt closed in within a setting that I typically new to be wide open. I could easily have believed there was something else on either side of me, other than what I knew to be there, had this been my first trip down this road.
Being fully aware that there was a vast open desert on both sides of me which I could no longer see. I couldn't help but think how sometimes our lives might be the same way. That we sometimes become so overcome by what is happening immediately around us, we lose sight that there is really anything beyond it.
Perhaps we might be having a bad day. Perhaps we feel the weight of the world on our shoulders. Perhaps its an illness or bad news. It's times like this that we need to remember the fog will lift.
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My appreciation for foster parents has grown by leaps and bounds. Being one here, for just two weeks so far, has given me a different perspective on the challenges they face. Yes, I don't think I can any longer say that I 'know' any of these ministry children until I get to live with them and care for them.
There has been laughter, there have been tears. There has been joy and happiness, there has been frustration. One of the younger girls, when being disciplined, says she wants to 'go home'. I wonder, just where home might be for her.
Yes, challenges abound when trying to get into the minds of these children, to better understand what they are feeling. It is not easy to sit down and simply talk with them because they have no idea on how to express themselves.
So they say nothing.
Maybe they're aware, as I am, that it's only been two weeks since we've been caring for them. How can they be expected to act or behave as if we have known them all of their lives.
And in two weeks, we'll be gone.
As we cross the midway point of our stay here, I'm starting to wonder, who will be more affected by our time spent here, us or them.
Every Friday the foster parents of the ministry get together to pray in song, discuss particular readings or scripture that may have helped get them through the previous week, or deal with a situation, discuss what might be on their hearts, or simply to discuss administrative details.
Last Friday morning, we attended our first meeting.
After our first week of having six children here, I now have a better understanding of how important this is for these parents. I now have a better understanding of how sometimes it is simply faith and hope that what ever issue they may be facing today, tomorrow will bring a better day. And if, by chance it doesn't, then maybe the next day will.
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These last four days seem to have simply flown by.
I am trying to get as much of my regular work done as I can. Although I had planned on getting a good jump on two websites needed by the ministry; one for the Namibia end and one for the U.S. operations, once again I find that planning for time here is all but impossible. I am also trying to spend as much time as I can with the six children we have here.
Homework has been a challenge on various fronts. Not having a sense of where each child is academically has required me to take a step or two back to try to figure out what it is they might not understand. We've decided that a multiplication-tables boot camp will be starting very soon for all of them.
The weekend itself seems a blur.
Saturday was spent doing some of my own work, working on a laptop for Sylvanus, hanging with the kids and visiting with Anna Lee and Daniel who had stopped by. They are two other ministry children who we had not seen yet since our return. Both are older [ninth grade] and my oh my have they grown and matured.
Sunday, Jackie and Brenda spent the afternoon in Swakopmund and meeting up with a foster mom and her two children. So, between all three families, there were thirteen children who spent the afternoon at the park. Me, I stayed back to try to get some stuff done and to make sure dinner was ready for when everyone came home. The quiet time was not bad either!
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A totally different view
I have been here for 10 days and have yet to see the sunrise or the sunset; something that I marvel at each time I come to Africa. Our living arrangements while here have us in the middle of the town, as opposed to Nan's house which is on the western and northern edge of town. From Nan's house you can see both the sunrise and sunset.
Similarly, there is more ambient light where we are, so the magnificence of the nighttime stars is also not the same from this vantage point. I did, however, get to view the stars on Sunday night when I walked over to Nan's to visit with Boniface.
Hopefully I am not sounding ungrateful for our living arrangements at Steve and Karrie's home. Certainly that is not the case and if it weren't for the availability of their home, at this time, this trip here may not have been possible for me. So, thank you again, Steve and Karrie.
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Taxi!
Later today I will be playing taxi driver and heading in to Swakopmund, which is about 30-40 miles west of Arandis and on the coast. There is one child, Revival, who every Tuesday is taken to into town for her speech therapy. Here is a link to the old site, if you have yet to meet Revival. The other stop will be to bring one of the children we have staying here with us, to an eye specialist. She has had an infection of sorts and the family practioners in Arandis (husband and wife) have treated it but are looking for a more specialized opinion to be on the safe side.
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Today is Jackie's birthday. Lekker verjaar!
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Our official Arandis breadmakers are featured below; Chandre and her sister Ross-Ann. As many of you may already know, Chandre captured my heart back in 2006 during my first trip here. It was fun to watch them, bake two batches of different types of bread without reading any recipes or really measuring.
I should be much more afraid of being mistaken and then finding out that Christianity is true than of being
mistaken in believing it to be true. (Pascal)
We all want to get to heaven but nobody wants to die. (Unknown...still looking)
God hasn't given you the events of your life to hold in your own hands. He is allowing you to watch them
unfold in His. (Shannon Kubiak, "God Called a Girl")
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